I believed God’s word would not return void
And the promises God made to us.
I knew that when man disappoints me
I still have God whom I can trust.
So, I prayed to God for an answer.
When I asked what to do He was mute.
Yet, somehow He still expected me 
To be free with my gratitude.

I was bereft but God did not comfort
I was lonely but saw no sign that He cared.
I believed in a God who was loving
But then, in my need, He just wasn’t there. 
I cried out to God in my anger,
Rebuked His name as a sign of revolt
Even that didn’t seem to matter
For He sent not one lightning bolt

So I cried and I cried in misery 
Until I finally fell asleep.
And I dreamed the most exquisite dream
In which God held me close and allowed me to weep.
He whispered that He will always love me.
He promised He is always near.
But, until I am still and can trust Him,
His voice can’t penetrate my fear. 

I woke in the morning with tears in my eyes
I was confused and I felt displaced.
I closed my eyes to gather my thoughts
And clearly, I saw the Lord’s face. 
Then suddenly, in a burst of clarity
My own sins were no longer hidden.
Humbly I called out to God in repentance
And God whispered back, ” Of course, you’re forgiven.”
Linda Troxell © 06/20/2022